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Home»Health»When Listening May Save a Life: The Human Price of Medical Gaslighting
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When Listening May Save a Life: The Human Price of Medical Gaslighting

VernoNewsBy VernoNewsJuly 27, 2025No Comments6 Mins Read
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When Listening May Save a Life: The Human Price of Medical Gaslighting
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I used to be 8-years-old, sporting my favourite yellow lace costume, and holding my mom’s hand as we entered the physician’s workplace. I felt familiarity and dread. My mom was uninterested in the a number of checks and the dearth of solutions. I didn’t know if I used to be the issue; was I not translating the outcomes and physician’s findings accurately? However I used to be eight and at every appointment I used to be the one one within the room who spoke each English and Spanish. Tag, I used to be it. 

This explicit day was completely different. Each the physician and the nurse got here in and wouldn’t make eye contact. The physician checked out his papers and mentioned, “It’s most cancers. Inform her it’s most cancers.” Then he turned and left the room. The nurse stayed and requested if I knew what that meant. I mentioned I knew it was a foul, scary factor as a result of my mother was crying and appeared scared. 

For the subsequent yr, I went to each radiation remedy and infusion appointment. I used to be like a handbag sitting beside my mom, a prized possession to be protected as I supplied assist. I used to be the translator, medicine runner, and assist agent when Dad was working. I by no means missed a day of faculty and I acquired straight A’s. Don’t fear, Mother, “I will likely be your protector.”

This was the early Nineteen Seventies. My darker-skinned Latina mom was invisible. There was no eye contact or listening to her true signs throughout her most cancers journey. If she tried to explain her sickness and the horrible uncomfortable side effects of her remedies, she was instructed by means of me, “Inform her, doesn’t she wish to get higher? She ought to be grateful she is getting care.” I by no means translated the impolite and merciless phrases. If it made me really feel yucky, she by no means heard it. I heard what was mentioned and so they scarred me. I knew gaslighting in any respect ranges — from the absence of acknowledgement, to the dearth of offering medicine; from ready too lengthy to order the right testing, to the acutely aware and unconscious bias that was exercised. 

Why is it a affected person grievance?

I refuse to make use of the phrases “affected person grievance” as a result of the phrase devalues the fact of the system decline my mom was experiencing. Affected person complaints. I’m wondering who thought it was applicable to label our signs and misery as an annoyance to the supplier?

My analysis signifies that the time period “grievance” originates from scientific and authorized traditions the place “to complain” meant to specific struggling, concern, or misery — not simply dissatisfaction. On this context, a “grievance” isn’t about whining; it’s about reporting a symptom or situation that requires medical consideration. As we search to transition to patient-centered care, we should always take into account renaming the explanation for presenting for care. 

Understanding the supply 

As I grew older, I discovered myself within the midst of my very own critical-care journey, overcoming three cardiac arrests, a stroke, bilateral hip replacements, and a complete reconstruction of my belly cavity. My affected person journey redefined my relationship with healthcare from a income cycle perspective of economic sustainability for my well being system to bringing humanity again to healthcare. Throughout my journey, I used to be uncared for by well being care suppliers and accused of drug abuse whereas I lay on my toilet flooring with a 103-degree fever, septic, and going into multi-system organ failure. 

Let’s be sincere. Clinicians are taught to scale back pointless care. However there’s a razor-thin line between avoiding pointless checks and failing to imagine a affected person’s signs.

This isn’t a name to order each scan or panel a affected person requests. It’s a name to hear totally, with out bias. To make use of scientific judgment knowledgeable by belief, not stereotypes.

Gaslighting can appear like:

• Refusing to order fundamental labs for a affected person in clear misery.

• Labeling sufferers as “troublesome” as a result of they ask knowledgeable questions.

• Assuming drug use based mostly on look or race earlier than evaluation.

• Ignoring signs as a result of the presentation doesn’t match textbook profiles.

When these assumptions turn into patterns, they turn into systemic.

Embracing patient-centered care

Greater than 40 years of analysis has proven that relationship-centered communication improves outcomes. These aren’t buzzwords; they’re evidence-based methods that assist clinicians stability empathy with experience. And so they’re teachable. They don’t require further hours — simply intentionality.

Think about the impression of claiming:

“I imagine you.”

“I can see you’re in ache.”

“Let’s determine this out collectively.”

This sounds easy, however when these phrases are mentioned authentically, it’s transformative for an individual. 

The pandemic woke up the healthcare {industry} to the acutely aware and unconscious bias towards girls and folks of shade. Medical faculties began addressing the difficulty of discrimination within the curriculum. They did this in various methods, together with visitor lecturers and analysis papers that validated the results of and the necessity to shift to a patient-centered care method. Affected person-centered care includes offering sufferers with remedy of their signs, historical past, feelings, social, and monetary wants. When sufferers expertise being acknowledged as an entire individual, they’re extra engaged in their very own care journey. 

It’s important to offer sufferers with the attention and toolkit to navigate their care by offering monetary and care literacy. This solely occurs after we place affected person listening and communication first. 

When sufferers are dismissed as a substitute of believed, misdiagnosis thrives and lives hold within the stability. Listening isn’t simply good observe — it’s life-saving.

Picture: Getty Pictures, monique28


Niobis Queiro is the CEO of the Queiro Group, a consulting and training company that focuses on helping healthcare professionals in enhancing affected person care. As an authorized power management practitioner, Queiro helps people and groups set and obtain targets, and domesticate a tradition of neighborhood. Previous to founding her consulting agency, Queiro had three a long time of healthcare-industry expertise working within the areas of income cycle, finance, and expertise. She can be the writer of Pleasure Notes: Balancing the Trauma with Triumph, wherein she chronicles her resilience by means of private losses and well being crises, together with a near-death expertise.

This put up seems by means of the MedCity Influencers program. Anybody can publish their perspective on enterprise and innovation in healthcare on MedCity Information by means of MedCity Influencers. Click on right here to learn the way.

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